Let’s be real, when I heard there was a new spy action comedy focused on a redheaded female heroine and her cat, I was already onboard. But unfortunately, ARGYLLE was not the thrilling and exciting movie I hoped it would be. Don’t get me wrong, the film definitely has its fun moments, thanks largely in part to a phenomenal performance from Bryce Dallas Howard. However, the film’s almost 2 1/2 hour runtime starts to become an exercise in perseverance, especially in the first 90 minutes.
Written by Jason Fuchs (not Taylor Swift), the film centers around Elly (Bryce Dallas Howard), a bestselling author that is wrapping up the latest book in her Argylle spy series. She tries to imagine what her main character, Agent Argylle (Henry Cavill) will do for the book’s final chapter, but is having a bit of writer’s block. Instead of spinning her wheels at home, Elly decides to grab her cat Alfie and jump on a train to visit her parents in the hopes that it will help spur some new ideas. However, her world is turned upside down when a strange man named Aidan (Sam Rockwell) sits down beside her and warns that her life is in danger.
You see, members of “The Division,” a villainous private spy organization, have read Elly’s books and believes she has the ability to predict the future. They want to co-opt Elly for their own benefit and use her to get information on the whereabouts of the “Masterkey,” which could expose The Division if it fell into the wrong hands. Now Elly has to lean on Aidan to protect her and her beloved cat, as well as to help her get to the bottom of what The Division really wants out of her.
Unsurprisingly, the excellent acting cadre in the film is one of my favorite elements, especially Bryce Dallas Howard, who is given so much to do within her character arc. Hilarious performances from Sam Rockwell and Catherine O’Hara were additional highlights… and had Dua Lipa been given more screentime, I think she would have really shined too. Still, even with such phenomenal actors, it’s hard to get over the film’s seemingly bloated script that sometimes gets lost in the details. At several times, I found myself trying to remember what all of the characters were going after and why.
Movie runtimes don’t intimidate me. After all, my two favorite movies are THE SOUND OF MUSIC and TITANIC. But what does intimidate me are movies that are long for no apparent reason, and that is the issue with ARGYLLE. I have no idea why director Matthew Vaughn needed almost 2 1/2 hours to tell this story, but good gracious does it drag in the first two acts. Thankfully, the film takes a turn at around the 90 minute mark that not only made the action a lot more interesting, but also made me so much more invested in where the story was going. It’s not often that a turn completely changes my perception of a film, but this one definitely did; it’s unfortunate that it took the film so long to build to it.
Audiences are also going to have a hard time with the movie’s silliness, which gets progressively more and more outrageous as the film goes on. Without getting into spoilers, it truly gets so out there, you may wonder if your fountain drink is laced with something :ahem: special. I usually don’t get too hung up on these more absurdist moments in movies when the films earn it, but ARGYLLE takes the leap without sticking the landing. And more than that, in a lot of scenes, the CGI leaves little to be desired. I’m happy that Alfie the cat was never put in harm’s way, but the over-reliance on CGI, even for normal scenes involving Alfie, was a little bizarre.
ARGYLLE isn’t the worst movie you’re going to see this year, but I can’t in good conscience recommend that you take almost three hours out of your day to see it… especially when the first 90 minutes are a bit of a snooze. The story feels unnecessarily convoluted, and because I liked less than half of the movie, I had to give it a less than stellar grade. For a similarly toned comedic espionage action film that actually gets it right, I recommend you instead put on one of my favorites, KNIGHT AND DAY.
My Review: C-
